I've given up, it's going on eBay.
Has BMW been bad to you? Did you buy a New BMW lemon? Have you spent too long at the service shop, dealing with "technicians" who think you're an idiot? Did the electrics start failing? Did your beautiful New BMW start stalling? What about that transmission? Did BMW tell you it was your imagination? Did your sub-frame crack? Did they promise they'd call you soon to arrange something?
Don't worry you're not the only one who bought a BMTroubleU, but now you can tell the world your real "BMW Experience" by simply emailing your story and images to rayone2.3456 AT blogger.com you need to replace ' AT ' with an '@' cos I get too much spam (privacy statement)